Donkey-zebra mating scandal

 
A round-up of this week’s funniest news items and comments

A DONKEY MATED with a zebra to produce a brown animal with black and white striped legs.

The zedonk (half zebra, half donkey) was born last week at the Xiamen Haicang Safari Park in China.

How did it happen? A female zebra had been sharing an enclosure with three male donkeys. None of the males has admitted parentage. (Honestly, guys, that’s SO typical.)

Now here’s the thing. Some people are worried that the zoo may get into BIG trouble, because Zedonk sounds like the personal name of former Chinese leader Mao Zedong. I heard this from reader Carol Wan, who sent me the information about the beast.

Will the Chinese communist party take this as an insult and send the creature off for re-education?

Mao Zedong’s main achievement was to cause 30 million deaths, but he is considered a hero in China, not sure why. Perhaps people don’t like their grandparents?

But there are other possibilities. Beijing leaders may see the birth of the zedonk as a compliment, and make the animal head of the politburo.

This would be a good thing, Carol says: “Equine species are good with people, so we could see an improvement in China’s human rights situation.”
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I love getting comments and letters from readers. They are so interesting, and they basically do my work for me.

Here are more comments from readers which deserve wider attention…
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1) On Lift Lurker’s recent idea of identifying voices on conference calls by assigning theme tunes, Graham Lovell sent this list.

Downsizing specialist: “Another One Bites the Dust”.

Office temp: “Substitute”.

Consultant: “We Can Work It Out”.

And, for the member of staff who always leaves at exactly 5:00pm: “Clocks”, followed by “She’s Not There.”
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Ameena Chowdhury said:

Muammar Gaddafi could have used: “The Man Who Can’t Be Moved”.

Dominique Strauss-Kahn “The Ladykiller”;

And Rupert Murdoch “Do You Want to Know a Secret?”
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2) Jaya Wickrama sent me a tale from last week’s New York Post to add to our dumb criminals file.

A man from that city called the police, gave his name and address, and said: “I killed my mom.”

A few minutes later, he called again, saying: “I mean, she committed suicide.”

After thinking about it, police decided to go with his first version, and arrested suspect Jonathan Schwartz, 41, on murder charges.

Moral: think before you confess, not after. Better moral: Don’t kill people.

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3) Here’s a cynical one-liner from a reader named Ameer:

“A man is innocent until proven bankrupt.”

Something tells you’ve used criminal defense lawyers, Ameer.
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4) Pigeons never forget, French scientists discovered, according to a reader who did not want her name printed.

The small gray birds remember who feeds them and who doesn’t. Even when the feeder and the non-feeder swap clothes, pigeons aren’t fooled, but look at the humans’ faces to see who’s who, claims Paris-based researcher Dr Dalila Bovet.

I was amazed at this. How did pigeons get to be so smart?

If I wear a hat my dog won’t let me into the house. My children are pretty much the same.

Can I get pigeons to train my dog? Or my children, come to that?

The really scary thought is this: all the pigeons who have ever pooped on me probably did so DELIBERATELY, knowing who I was.

I’m never leaving home again. Bang goes my plan to visit the zebra-donkey and tell its keepers to name it Mao, as in Mao Zedonk.
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ON RELATED MATTERS… More links from commentators:

Bangladesh is beautiful, but is one of the least visited places by tourists. It’s tourism slogan used to be “Get here before the tourists do”. Tamanna sent a great link to a video of Bangladesh.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ppf-UA36ljE&feature=share
(Above pic by Dick Durrance, Nat Geo.)
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Here’s Bianca’s excuse for eating… (pic comes from the link she sent)

Okay, I admit it, occasionally Western food CAN be as tasty as Eastern food…

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Ram’s interesting series of links included a report about the hundreds of kilos of gold and silver found at the home of recently deceased guru Sai Baba. He writes: “ Godmen are rich , Politicians are rich ,  Businessmen are rich  , but common man is not .”
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And one of this website’s favorite pin-ups got married recently. I know all the guys will be weeping. Yet at the same time, we have to congratulate the lucky guy. Below is our favorite pic of Farah, and below that is her wedding pic.
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Best wishes to Farah and her groom…

 

 

 

 

Technorati Tags: pigeons,dumb criminals,jonathan schwartz,zedonk

Comments

[Paul]

Congrats to Farah. You wedding looks like it was beautiful. Best wishes for a happy and prosperous union. :-)

[Paul]

In regards to the newly created species, the Zedonk let us remember what the great leader Deng Xiao Ping taught us...

'It doesn't matter if the the zedonk is brown or striped as long as it can kick Mickey Mouse's 3-letter word for a donkey.'

;-)

[farah]

gee...thanks everyone and uncle especially for your wishes :)

[Bianca Schlimm]

A zedonk is quite impossible, biologists claimed...it is really sweet looking.

in the West Mao is also still a hero often...you can buy cups with his face etc.

Why don't you show the view into Urus' changing room?
such nice looks! People comment that they can see why Urus only need short pants. HA HA. For me it's enough!
Such nice looking man, the face I mean.
:-)

[grandpa]

I believe that everyone was fooled by this picture;
Zebras, being from Africa, are a very smart animal, caring for their offspring, like any mother in the world
This one , in particular, knows that the weather in China can be chilly at times, unlike her home country.
She knitted a nice pair of socks, to remind her offspring where he is from....
aaaargh those internet viewer, how gullible..

[Lift Lurker]

So the Chinese Communist Party send bureaucrat to investigate:

Bureaucrat: So did you call this animal "zedonk" to make fun of Mao Zedong?

Zookeeper: Of course not dear sir! "zedonk" is just made up name by English speaking media.

Bureaucrat: Ok, maybe we believe you.

Zookeeper: Thank you dear sir!... eh... it's feeding time for the animal, so I have to go now and feed Little Chairman.

(Correction Uncle Jam, the conference theme-music is wonderful, but not my idea. I think it came from mad female investment banker in China (a 4-word tautology!). Just like the male donkeys I do not wish to claim what are not belong to me)

[farah]

speaking of China i just came across this article on how there's a school there that teaches women on how to attract rich men.
http://in.lifestyle.yahoo.com/want-to-marry-rich.html

[Chamin]

First, congrats to Farah!

As for the ZeDonk, can we name him "Bra-Key" instead?

Just for information: The Japanese pronunciation of Mao Zedong is "More-Taku-Toe." This is also a code word for "money" since he appears on all the bills.