The east-west toilet divide

A Western male toilet problem doesn’t apply in most of Asia

Guest columnist Angela Sias discovers something on a date with a Western guy.

 

Angela writes: While on a date at the zoo, the guy and I witnessed a female white tiger going to the toilet right in front of zoo visitors, behind the plexiglass window of course. A school of fish followed closely behind her to immediately ingest her digestive output.

"This is just like in my nightmare," I told him.

"You dreamed you were a white tiger?" he asked.

"Aiyaaah! I mean that I have this recurring dream that I wanted to go to the toilet but I could never get privacy because every toilet I go to, including behind a huge rock or tall bushes, there are always people around, so I couldn't do it." (Mental note: Men are such idiots when it comes to talking about dreams and where protein from protein powder comes from.)

My date nodded thoughtfully.

"Do you have nightmares like that?" I prodded, trying to get some insights from the male mind.

"Well, my toilet nightmare involves women who moan about the toilet seat. Do you?"

I thought for a second, trying to figure out what it is about toilet seats that makes western women moan. Do they have vibrating toilet seats?

He noticed the prolonged silence and blank gaze, so he explained that he was talking about women who complained about men not putting the toilet seat down after using it.

"Oh. I don't really care,” I said. “Our toilets don't have seats."

His usually cold expression broke into a huge smile, sunshine bursting out of the clouds. He took my hand and asked me to be his girlfriend. I excused myself to go to the toilet.

 
[Asian toilet]

*
ON RELATED MATTERS…

Three people from this site, Angela, Chamin and Mr Jam, were all probably in Japan at the same time recently—but sadly did not meet. Mr Jam was only there for a single speech. Angela took some pictures of the wacky signs that you find all over that country.

Technorati Tags: toilet,squat toilet,toilet seat up

This particular sign she was inclined to interpret as a challenge…

Comments

[Chamin AKA Maria Chaminda Veneracion DeJesus III]

Next time any of you come to Japan, please tell me!

[Nury]

Hi Chamin, I will definitely track you down next time.
Sadly, I was just there for one of those absurd meetings where I fly in for one event and then fly straight out. Saw nothing but the airport, limo, hotel, limo, airport and then I was home again.

[Dancer Arroyo]

I'm usually in Japan once a year. Next year, I'll be in the pay-200yen-per-toilet-use Mount Fuji. And yes, many don't have seats. I'm still trying to get myself mentally prepared.

[sej]

After all these years, and countless trips to Hong Kong, China, Singapore, Japan, Malaysia and Thailand, I still haven't worked out how to use one of those damn toilets yet.

[Christy]

There are squat toilets in China separated by a very short barrier only and as a result you can see, hear, and smell everyone who is doing their business at the same time and sometimes they talk to you. @_@

[sej]

One toilet I tried using in China, was a room about 5m long by about 3m wide, had three toilets side by side.

There was no barrier, no double door or vanity screen to the outside world. Each toilet consisted of a pair of parallel concrete strips, about six inches apart, and nothing more than a big hole beneath.

And black. There was a pile of coal stashed in the corner, the dust from which covered everything.

[Chamin]

Hi Nury,

I know that kind of trips; too short, and every minute is already planned. Oh well, next time!

[TS]

It' not only the toilet seat that have women on the war path.
Some times the floor is the victim of "friendly fire" when the man "drains the potatoes".
How do you think he will perform when the target is half a meter lower than normal?

[Karuna aka Kaye Moreno]

guess...we just have to wait till Angela gets to read a much bigger "challenge"... that will get her to complete the task she started at this one !!!!

[Lift Lurker]

I know that kind of trips

Chamin are you talking about trip to Japan or trip to toilet?

[Lift Lurker]

Oh, speaking of Japan. My wife and children plan to visit Japan one year from now. They plan to bring me along (and also bring me back with them to Liftuania I hope).

What is best places to bring young children below 10 years old?

(We also hope to visit Korea if it's still there)

@grandpa, what kind of airplane should we take? Airbus 757? Boing Boing A-350? Antonov?

[Jason]

Nice tummy :)

[grandpa]

Hey son

this is a strange request.
I thought that Liftuanians were only traveling by cable car;

About japanese toilets, beware:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zw2HqyI-QRA
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OR0D-nhQKvE&feature=related

[Fortuna (not the real one)]

Jason, your eyes...

[Jason]

What about my eyes? And my Fortuna or a not the real Fortuna? Me confused.

[Nury]

I have to agree with Jason, Angela has a very nice tummy.
But Fortuna, also being an incredibly gorgeous person (see pic of her on right hand side column, scroll up), probably also has nice one.
Sad news for all you youngsters: once you get to be grown up, your tummy is never nice again, however many hours you spend in the gym...

[Jeeem]

That last photo..."Naughty girl" gettin' ready to strip...god she's hot. I love those nice, wide hips and those hip hugging jeans. Asian women rock while American women rust.

-Jeeem-