Drama at the arrivals desk

What if everyone asked the same questions as immigration officers?

A LITTLE GIRL from Asian roots is on a “no-fly” list in the United States. Six-year-old Alyssa Thomas, originally from India, was told she was listed as a suspected terrorist when she tried to check-in for a flight in the US city of Cleveland. The US Homeland Security department was informed of her age but has declined to remove her name, I heard from reader KK Ram.

Homeland Security gets criticized a lot, but this decision is smart. Man, I’m telling you, six-year-olds on aircraft are DANGEROUS. Making you spill boiling hot drinks on your lap SEVERAL TIMES PER TRIP is de rigueur.

You’d be much safer sitting next to Al Qaeda guys, who at least limit damage to their own genitals.
*
Readers sent in a flood of travel tales after an item in this space about the unanswerable questions asked by immigration officers in the US, such as: “So, Mr Chan, why is your name Chan?”

A New York immigration officer asked Minkha, a reader raised in Poland, how it was that she spoke English.

Minkha replied: “Because I learned it at school.”

The officer responded: “Why do they teach English in Poland?”

The correct answer is probably better left unsaid: “So we can have intelligent conversations with almost everyone, except of course no-hopers like you.”
*
A US immigration officer asked reader Jason Sydon why he did not have a degree in computer science if he used computers at work.

Jason explained that he didn’t need one to use programs like Word and Excel.

The officer became suspicious, declaring that he’d never heard of those programs.

“Microsoft?” offered Jason. “Bill Gates?”

The officer had never heard of them, either.

How did a guy that dumb get into a position of feeding and clothing himself, let alone carrying loaded weapons in airports?
*
Kim Parfitt told me her husband accidentally ticked YES to the US visa questions asking whether he had ever been a communist, a Nazi and a drug dealer. “He’s a bit vague,” Kim said. Luckily, his secretary intercepted the form before it was sent to the embassy. I reckon he owes her his life, Kim.
*
Meanwhile, Otis Schindler (or Lift Lurker) asked what would happen if US immigration type questions were asked by other people. Imagine the scene.

Neighborhood baker:

“Why did you buy 10 loaves of bread today but only eight yesterday? What kind of jam will you put on this bread?”

Taxi driver:

“How long have you two known each other? Is this destination her place or your place?”

Travel agent:

“Are you going to do terrorist acts on this trip? Are these really your children?”

Google:

“Why did you search for ‘Miley Cyrus’?”

Arrival immigration officer:

“Did you perform terrorist acts during your trip overseas?”

Waiter:

“Why did you order white wine with steak? Why do you know how to speak English?”
*

I often wonder what sort of conversations US immigration officers have with their spouses.

Spouse: “Morning.”

Officer: “Why do you think it is morning?”

Spouse: “Because the sun’s rising.”

Officer: “Why is it rising? Did you cause it to do so?”

Spouse: “Possibly.”

Officer: “What sort of response is that?”

Spouse: “An adverb expressing conditionality.”

That should puzzle him long enough for her to get out of the house.
*
*
*
I AM ON THE ROAD,  so apologies in advance for a slow-down in activity from me over the next few weeks. I reckon I’ll be able to put up new postings once or twice a week.

I was thrilled to get a bit of internet access at Galle Face Hotel in Colombo and read the comments to the previous posting – really great, well done all.
*
*
RELATED ITEMS:

The immigration officer’s smile

New passport rules

Passport photo madness

6 dumbest airport guard tales

 

Technorati Tags: immigration,humor

Comments

[H]

Attention: people with children, make sure you have ear plugs and your eyes are glued to a tv screen or a book. and buy a ticket for your child in such a way that both of you are seperated considerably but not too far away.

[sej]

Thanks Nury, but!! Wrong Jason...

[sej]

Taxi driver:
“How long have you two known each other? Is this destination her place or your place?”

Reminded me of a story Dr Karl once told about being a taxi driver. In an interview with Andrew Denton:

ANDREW DENTON: You were also a taxi driver. I'm imagining you as the kind of taxi driver that was forever talking to your passengers.

DR KARL KRUSZELNICKI: No. In fact, I was intensely shy as a taxi driver. And it was that experience of being a taxi driver that stopped me from being so shy. So I'd ask people and say, "So you guys sound like you're having a bit of a fight there in the back. When was the last time you guys had sex?" And they'd tell me. It was amazing. Because they were in my living room, you see, and so I could ask them anything and they would answer. And I'd never see them again, they'd never see me and it was a wonderful, liberating experience.

Full Transcript here: http://www.abc.net.au/tv/enoughrope/transcripts/s1172878.htm

[Vernette]

I must agree, most children I come across these days are terrorists one way or the other... to make matter worse, they look adorable!!

[Mahjuja]

i just remembered that there is also a question in the visa application that goes something like,"Do you have any mental illness or psychological disorder?"

I wonder how a schizophrenic/bipolar person would answer that?

[Vernette]

"Yes, WE do." or "No, WE don't."...??

[Chamin]

When writing research papers (part of my job) and theses, the convention is to use "we" even if the work was done by just one person. Does this mean mainstream research was started by a schizophrenic?

Hmm..., some of the papers I recently read can be best explained that way :o)

[Ram]

Here is a link for the short film "INSIDE".
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OjTOs1L3SBg
I dont know whether it can come in the category of schizophrenia or MPD. But, the short film is done in a brilliant way.

[Ram]

@Chamin,

What u say reminds me of a joke I read in PHD Comics...Take a look...

http://www.phdcomics.com/comics/archive.php?comicid=562

[grandpa aka faye libad aka fardel]

Here we go again..............
the TAIOS
traveller's anti Immigration officer syndrome..
Uncle cannot prepare his suitcase without picking at us , in aviation;
But i am afraid that it will be worse when he comes back..
uncle
why don't you pick at elevators, for a change?
I need to correct you all
Immigration officers do not carry gun ( except in France,where they cannot have any bullet in their guns)
with their IQ, the roof of the terminal would look like a sieve, or a strainer ( to help the Immigration staff strain passengers, like uncle Nury)

There is worse terrorist than kids or Al Qaida, but it is politically incorrect to talk about it
They are pretty, attractive, they can subdue half the worlds' population into a war, called marriage, and destroy them by starvation.

[Jason]

Jason Sydon, has my named been changed to protect the innocent from bone-headed immigration retaliation?

My missus is currently on the plane to Canada with her brother who is immigrating today. I wonder what stupid questions they will be asked. Stay tuned.

[Vernette]

@ Fardel

Usually, it's men who ask to be engaged in this war called marriage hehehe... they usually dig their own graves, by choice, I'm afraid :)

[grandpa aka faye libad aka fardel]

visitor in Changi
what is the purpose of your visit?
- see my son
What is this ?
-I don't know
don't tell me that it is for your son; who is it for?
- I don't know.

I was told that she was a wild and wise grandma........

rejected!!!!!!

Can you find out what happened to my messenger?

[Vernette]

This is not related to any of the above... Anyone has a cure to caffeine overdose??

[Angela]

Vernette - sleeping pills.

actually depends on what objective are you trying to achieve by getting rid of the caffein in your system.

*

fardel - nobody contacted me at all.

*

Today I read again this column http://mrjam.typepad.com/diary/2009/01/more-on-cubicle-life.html

My countdown to freedom from cubicle already began on 1 July.

I feel like a prisoner counting down the day til her parole...cannot say release as I may be in another prison, the kind where the walls are wider apart and extends to kitchen and bedrooms. at least I can cook and can sleep in a bed if I want to. heh heh heh... bet you still in cubicle will be so envious.

[grandpa aka faye libad aka fardel]

Usually, it's men who ask to be engaged in this war called marriage hehehe... they usually dig their own graves, by choice, I'm afraid :)

They are lured and trapped into it.
since they are idiots, they would better suffer, be ripped of on all their belongings than admit that they made a mistake

""This is not related to any of the above... Anyone has a cure to caffeine overdose??"""

Run around the neighborhood until you drop.

[grandpa aka faye libad aka fardel]

"as I may be in another prison, the kind where the walls are wider apart and extends to kitchen and bedrooms. at least I ca"

Now that you are getting married , I can come visit you ... and be safe

[Vernette]

Thanks Angela. But is that the only way? I mean, I get a lot of caffeine when I'm very sleepy and when my heart beats like crazy, I have to take sleeping pills? Then the caffeine again, and then the sleeping pills... and so I'm stuck in this loop... so how so how?????

[grandpa aka faye libad aka fardel]

@vernette
get married.
You will be so busy that you will have no time for coffee.
you will be so busy that you will be sleeping awake

[sej]

Vernette,

Best way: Have a holiday - no caffeine, no sleeping pills. You'll be a wreck for a few days, and crave caffeine pretty badly, but it will pass.

Jason,

I'm the Jason who Nury inadvertantly mis-attributed those comments too...

[sej]

Fardel,

You're describing having kids.

[Vernette]

@ Fardel

I am, already married but still have the time to go to work and have 2 coffees a day...!! Must agree with Sej -- you're describing having kids :)

@ Sej

But I just had a 9-month holiday before I started work again less than 2 months ago... I can't spoil myself like that...

[grandpa aka faye libad aka fardel]

Just take another 9 month break......
the one which ends up with kids...
lifetime business guaranteed

[sej]

Fardel,

She needs to get rid of the caffeine first, otherwise she'll end up with kids who suffer caffeine withdrawl symptoms...

Vernette,

You could potentially take sick-leave. You are potentially treating an illness, albeit self-inflicted.

[Jason]

Fardel and Vernette, to join your banter:

You've heard of divorce Barbie? She comes with all of Ken's stuff.

[kartini]

@ram: it's funny how the doctor is the one who becomes the mastermind in getting the multiple personalities out of mental hospital. The short movie is on multiple peersonality disorder. Schizophrenics, if I am not mistaken, hear voices outside their head, telling them what to do and they communicate with these voices outside their head. This distinguishes between schizophrenia and normal folk like us who hear our own thoughts(although I wonder if immigration officers have these, judging by the article today).
@vernette: flush the caffeine out by drinking a lot of fluids and peeing away. You are advised to drink 8 glasses of water per day, anyway, unless if you have kidney failure.

[kartini]

btw, I recommend watching, Shutter Island, if you are into psychiatric illnesses.
@jason: It is so not true what they say about Barbie. Watch ToyStory3.

On a lighter note, overhead a conversation:
Lady A: Congratulations, B. I heard you got married last month!
Lady B: Oh, it's terrible! He wants me to come back from work at 5pm, cook dinner for him, go to bed by 10pm... And in the morning,.. He wants BREAKFAST!
Lady A: ???(thinks, "Yeah, I think that's what husbands expect from their wives."

And I really heard a male acquaintance make this comment(he has a 9-month baby boy whom he has his mom take care of):
Guy A: You know, Kartini, having a baby is not easy because you have to take care of it all the time.
Me: (thinks, "Take care of the baby 24/7, as opposed to what? After all, it is a human life incapable of feeding and caring itself at the moment. Duh!")

[TS]

The old chestnut: "8 glasses of water per day" is a myth.

Under normal conditions, your body is perfectly capable of telling you when you need fluid. It's called thirst.

[sej]

You know, I'm curious what's going to happen with this so-called Russian Spy-Ring in the US... is it real? Is it just a joke or a game gone bad? Is it all just made up?

Everyone's stories seem to have holes...

On the one hand, there must obviously be at least some evidence of something for the FBI to investigate them in the first place, yet, on the other hand, the information they've garnered is apparently freely available on the Internet anyway. So were they arrested because they really got their hands on something they shouldn't have? Or were they arrested simply for behaving suspiciously? Or did someone in the FBI need to show a result for a 20 year investigation that actually went nowhere?

I get the horrible feeling Immigration Officers have a fight on their hands.

[Chamin]

For me, milk helped to reduce coffee overdose. Not sure if that works for everyone.

Another solution that Engineering students have is reading their math textbooks. You might have your own equivalent :o)

[Vernette]

Thank you guys for the suggestions... I'm all better now. At one point, I felt so sick that my hands were shaking and I almost threw up on the bus coming home @__@

I got home, ate 1/3 of a lemon (didn't really want to throw up and that's the only sour thing I have in the house) and then slept for an hour. And then it's gone. Phew!

O, by the way, the baby thingy remains a thought at this stage. Could potentially remain the same for quite some time -- I've seen what my brother's boys are capable of, and I'm not capable of dealing with that sort of thing yet...
Cute little terrorists, great for a couple of hours, but after that...

[Mahjuja]

I agree with kartini, it's the guys who can't seem to stand a single woman, they immediately try to initiate a relationship which in my case seems to be marriage, even though I explicitly ignore them. It's analogous to the 'nature abhorrs a vaccum' saying in chemistry.

[fardel]

I can tell you that the opposite is true , in countries where there are more women than men.
It is like they are drowning and they hang onto the first branch they see.

[Christyn Rana]

Officer: what is the purpose of your visit?

my dad: to see my kids

officer: how do you know they are your kids?

my stunned dad: (stunned)

what do you get from an officer whose middle name is 'homer'?

[grandpa aka faye libad aka fardel]

for those who think that we are bad...
thersis worse than us:
http://g.sports.yahoo.com/soccer/world-cup/news/dutch-arrogance-may-be-biggest-opponent--fbintl_dw-dutchchokers070510.html

[Liza Abd Samad]

May I ask how might commercial pilots answer so-and-so questions of said immigration officers, off-duty or otherwise? At the rate of air travel nowadays, there should be a cheatsheet somewhere in the trainees' manual;

What are your reasons for traveling?
-To develop immunity to jetlag.

Do you carry any harmful or suspicious substance you need to declare?
-Only 150 people with gaseous emission that leaked when cramped in tight spaces.

[grandpa aka faye libad aka fardel]

No immigration staff ask silly questions to airlines pilots.
we have our brotherhood secrets:a black list of airport satff.
Some seats on our aircraft have a special equipment.
when the pilot presses the red button, a trap door opens...
Ni vu ,ni connu (i.e was not there, no more here)

[grandpa aka faye libad aka fardel]

russian spy ring

Some countries ( one) built their powers on creating war.
Now that they are running out of ammunition , they have to create new enemies ;
the terrorist are too small.
China is too big.
They have to go back in time.
It is called nostalgia.

They create a ring to keep war mongers busy

[Angela]

Dear Lift Lurker aka Otis Schindler, alias Boy Elebetor,

Today as I stepped out of my door into the lift lobby, the most beautiful sight greeted me: Lift carriage is right at my floor, as if waiting to greet me Good Morning and Happy Birthday!

The ride to the ground floor was smooth and efficient and miraculously did not smell like my 4th floor neighbor had been in it.

It was great!

Just wanted to share some good experiences for a change as we always talk about bad experiences.

Btw, today I am a year older, that makes me 25!

;-)

[sej]

Happy Birthday Angela!!

[Vaibhav]

Happy Birthday Angela.
Have a blast.

[Vernette]

Happy Birthday Angela!

[Karuna aka Kaye Moreno]

happy birthday Angela

[grandpa aka faye libad aka fardel]

Only 25 !?
I cannot believe it.
This number is too small for a grandma
Happy birthday.

[kartini]

Happy birthday, Angela! If you're 25, you must have had your spawn at the tender age of 14!!! *shock! horror!*

@TS: There is no harm in drinking 8 glasses of water a day, unless of course one has psychogenic drinking of water(drinking too much fluids because of dry mouth, which leads to other complications).

[Chamin]

Happy Birthday, Angela Obaachan (Grandma in Japanese)!

[Ram]

Happy Bday Angela!!!...Have a good day and a good year ahead...

Wise people count their Bday from the day they attained wisdom...

[grandpa aka faye Libad aka Fardel]

Angela
Just to remind you that a birthday is counted every year, not every four years.(°_°)

[tamanna]

A very happy birthday angela! dont you think we all deserve some sort of treat on this special occasion? :D

anyways I was once asked at the immigration of kuwait airport "whooo thiss?" ..I was 12 back then..the passport sized picure staring back was 10 year old version of me..I dont think 2 years made much of a difference back then..but I was stupid enough to jump and shout THAAATSSS MEEEEEE!!

[sej]

Come on guys, give the girl a break!!

I know numerous girls who regard themselves as 21 and so many months.

[Lift Lurker]

Dear Grandma,
It is our pleasure to serve

To let our passengers ride without being patted down

Without unpacking their underwear

Without taking off their shoes

Without waiting for 3 hours just to sit

To serve with dabawalla reliability

But our Lift camera records must have failed, because we have more than 30 years record of you being passenger.

At your request we are happy to hide some of those years as if they never happened.

[Moon Starer]

You've just described psychologists.

"What's your favorite color?"

"Um... I dunno, purple."

"And why is that?"

"I just like it, ok?"

"Hmm.. Indesicion. I diagnose borderline personality disorder. Next."

Happy Birthday, Angela.

[Mahjuja]

Happy Birthday Angela, so did you wear your birthday suit today? ;-)

[Angela]

Thank you gang, for the kind greetings and warm wishes. Today is really a blast and I promise to tell about it one day soon, perhaps in my blog.

As someone (is it Jason?) once said, I am among friends. So I will tell you my real age:

Angela is tobaiti years old today.

Hooray!!!! Pop the cherry...i mean the champagne.

[TS]

@kartini
Just google the word "Hyponatremia".
Surprisingly many people have died from excessive water consumption brought on by the wrongfull notion that there is no such thing as "too much water".
Besides, you have to go to the loo much more often which means you waste a lot of water if you don't follow the waterwise "if it's yellow let it mellow, if it's brown flush it down".... I might have broken that rule... I'd better go flush the toilet.

Happy birthday Angela.

[mike]

Always check date stamp after your passport is handed back to you. If the immigration officer doesn't like you they can easily change the date on the stamp and cause you all sorts of problems later.

[fardel]

Angela is tobaiti years old today

Doesn't tobaiti ,mean too much?
wait until you double it , like I did..................

[kartini]

@Angela: does tobaiti mean "more than 4"? XD hihi.

[sej]

Tobaiti is any number greater than four, right? So, is TobaitiTobaiti any number greater than forty four?

[Dancer Arroyo]

Best Wishes to Angela's tobaiti birthday. May you open tobaiti presents, drink tobaiti drinks and have tobaiti moments of good times.

[Vernette]

@ Sej

Yup, I'm 21 + more than 170 months!! haha!

But I always like the fact that Asian girls do look younger than their age most of the times, just need to act silly to convince others that we're really that young!!

[Angela]

Danke! for the greetings and wishes.

My wish is to be tobaiti wiser, tobaiti sweeter, tobaiti kinder, tobaiti courageous, and have tobaiti patience and tobaiti love.

By end of this month I will be free from cubicle duties and will be facing the big exciting world without regular employment. I can't wait, I'm like an inmate waiting for the release day to come. I imagine it's kinda like in shawshank redemption, I mean the lessons learned, without all the gory details, and with the hopeful ending.

A new beginning. Facing the unknown alone with only my self belief, and the persistence of a 3-yr old asking for ice cream. I will get it. I always get it. Sometimes I may get ice pop instead, but it is still ice and sweet and fattening. heh heh heh...

Tobaiti thank you again to the gang.

[Angela]

Since Uncle Nury won't be updating regularly, I just thought I will subject his readers and my fellow gang members to unsolicited updates on my lift experiment.

Every day when I come to work in the morning I talk to someone I don't know in the lift.

So far:

Experiment 1 : Tuesday

Specimen Background: Young Indian woman (late 20s or early 30s). must be single, from her demeanor, guessing she works as customer service executive, may be holding a mid-level supervisory position. Seen her take only cabs or drive a car.

Lift observation: seen her few times in the lift and notice she is togged in designer bags and stuffs from head to toe. Wears over-sized designer sunglasses. Today she is carrying an expensive looking coach leather bag.

Action: Smiled and commented, “I like your handbag, it’s very unique.”

Reaction: surprised, blushed, smiled and said thank you before exiting the lift. Made nervous gesture smoothing her already smooth hair. (comment: probably not used to getting compliments)

Prediction: She will be happy today even if her boss gives her stupid assignments

Post-lift interaction: She did not seem to recognize me when I saw her in the ladies toilet.

Experiment 2: Monday

Specimen background : English man. Seen him lots of times in the bus before and heard him talk to his colleagues. Guessing his age to be mid-late 30s. tall and lanky but have belly from too much lager and fish n chips. Wear sunglasses.

Observation: I noticed he has gym bag and is wearing gym shoes and taking a swing of water from sports bottle. Plugged into music player.

Action: Caught his eyes, smiled, and then commented, “you go to the gym?”

Reaction: Surprised but masked it quite well. Clumsily unplugged from music player and said “sorry?” smiled and showed his gap tooth. (comment: cute)
After I repeated my question, he said “yeah!” smiled some more and then said “see you around” as he exited the lift. (comment: me thinking, not after end of July)

Prediction: He thinks I am interested romantically and will smile and start a small talk the next time we bump into each other in the lift. He will probably wonder when he don’t see me anymore in this building.

Post-lift interaction: TBO (to be observed)

Experiment 3: Wednesday

Specimen background: Young woman (20’s) maybe doing office administration or clerical job. Looks to be Malay. Pimply faced and has frizzy hair.

Observation: Waited for me and held the lift doors open.

Action: Thank her. She is staring ahead as the doors closed. After we passed second floor, I asked “is that bag from Charles & Keith?”

Reaction: surprised first (I can tell from the way the eyes slightly enlarged and pupils dilated) then smiled and said, “yeah, I like it, it’s spacious” more smiles and said “see you” before she exited the lift. I wished her a good day.

Prediction: Will smile to me the next time we meet in the lift but will be too shy to start talking.

Post-lift interaction: TBO

Experiment 4: Thursday

Specimen background: elderly Chinese man. Must be 50-60 or older and has grandfatherly look about him. Kind looking face. Seen him few times around the building. When the glass doors didn’t slide open as I was trying to get out of the lobby, he advised me to walk back and then walk forward again so the sensor can pick up my signal. (I can’t help but wonder: the door sensor failed to sense my body warmth or is it set to pick up signal from certain height upwards and so it missed me?)

observation: likes to stare at me in the lift and gives small smile when I stare back and smile.

Action: cannot think of anything to say so I just smiled.

Reaction: He smiled back and we smiled at each other until lift opened at 6th floor and we both got out and walked separate directions.

Prediction: thinks I am weird but pretty and likes to smile so he will probably smile again but will never say anything at all.

Post-lift Interaction: refer to prediction.

Comment: I later found out he is the owner of the building. Seen him being driven by a chauffeured Mercedes.

* Experiment done on different weeks. May not be continous days. I just added the day to see if the day of the week would affect specimen's mood and subsequently produce different reaction.

[sej]

Angela,

Suggested Experiment: Walk into the lift, and face the back.

Prediction: Everyone else will also end up facing the back of the lift.

[gran dpa]

I am a sore looser and this is my legacy

[grandpa aka faye Libad aka Fardel]

who put this stupid comment in my name?

[Ram]

Most likely our very old friend who was writing bad comments in this page some time ago...

[Nury]

Hi guys, I am writing this from an internet cafe in Sri Lanka, in the hill country.

Angela, Fardel et al, thanks so much for being so entertaining while I am unable to get near a computer or internet connection.

And don't worry about the occasional idiot who posts something here -- idiots are a fact of life, and we can spot them a mile away, whatever name they use.

I love Angela's elevator experiments but I suspect that Lift Lurker will be upset that you are using his beloved vehicle for social engineering!

[Chamin]

I have been running a "smile" experiment since 2001, smiling and trying to get smiles in return from cleaning staff and security guards of the buildings that I studied/worked.

For security guards, I could get half of them to smile back, around 25% to have conversations. One or two tried very hard to avoid eye contact to not see smiles.

As for the cleaning staff, they are always nice. One Malay lady used to exchange food with me. She did not speak English and I did not speak Malay, but we talked in Italian (okay, hand gestures).

[Mike]

I love angela's experiment everyone enjoys a brief moment of attention and validation. My experiment will be saying thank you in unexpected circumstances.

[Karuna aka Kaye Moreno]

Angela
Post-July are you marrying the elderly man who owns the buildings and moves in a chauffeured Mercedes ?
:D

[fardel]

If you want to be disappointed in social experiment.`Say good morning" to passer-by who look at you in Paris

If you want to be REALLY disappointed in social experiment.`Say good morning" to old ladies who look at you in Paris.
As a matter of fact , you say good morning, and run fast before they call the police.

[Lift Lurker]

Mr Jam is a little right.

I do not like social experiments.

People may have same psychological reaction as white rats.

We may have same motivation and instinct as white rats.

We may respond in same way to medicine as white rats

We may have same maternal instinct as white rats

OUr young people may have same adventure spirit as young white rats

And we may act as stupid as white rats

But people are not...uhm... I was going to say people are not white rats but now I am not sure where we are different...

Anyway, my Lift are not belong to laboratory.

If you smile, be sincere.

If you greet, be sincere.

Leave experimentation to Economy class and Business class and Chamin's classes.

[Karuna aka Kaye Moreno]

Since the blog is not updated. Here is today's Nury's article for those who may hav missed it
http://www.thestandard.com.hk/news_detail.asp?we_cat=5&art_id=100220&sid=28803909&con_type=1&d_str=20100708&fc=7

[Angela]

Thanks Karuna. That's just so RANDOM!!!

Now it is begining to make sense to me why my 11 yr old spawn has been using this word so much :)

And she rolled her eyes when I asked who is justin bieber and what is the song baby about. I only hear the word baby so many times but don't understand the rest of the song.

Nury's post today made sense!!!

gosh! just so RANDOM!!!

(@@) -> Angela rolling her eyes

[grandpa aka faye Libad aka Fardel]

Random thought:
Lift Lurker comparing brown skinned people to white rats.
Isn't there racial prejudice there?

[grandpa aka faye Libad aka Fardel]

@Lif lurker
did you see my messenger somewhere: dark skinned, tall, pretty ? maybe she is elevatorphobic ?

[sej]

Elevatorphobic?? Not Elavrodite??

[Angela]

liftophobia

[Angela]

Karuna - post-july I hope to be a FREE woman in every sense of the way. 2-3 months sabbatical to contemplate and recover from the work stress. In RANDOM order.

After that I hope to get someone to commit to me, right now I only get from him compliment.

[Angela]

word, not way. I think :)

[sej]

FREE woman in every sense of the way

What does that mean?

[Karuna aka Kaye Moreno]

@Angela
post-July plan a trip to Hong Kong

[grandpa aka faye Libad aka Fardel]

@grandma
You are such a dreamer!
Prince Charming exists only in dreams;
Sweet dreams
@sej
Upside down included

[kartini]

@nury: Odd! I thought I've read the article somewhere before and it is sssoooo not true that 'random' is the new 'in' word. I've been using that word for the past decade!

Here's a story for you to decide on whether it is a good thing or a bad thing when someone(i.e. your children) tells you that something(i.e. the article you wrote) is random.

A medical student was posted to her psychiatry posting in the middle of nowhere. She decided to go home during the weekend and got the directions to the train station. Whilst walking to town, she felt unsure of the route that she was taking, so she asked a random passerby if she was walking the right way. He tells her that she's on the right track and so she proceeds, gets to the train station and enjoys her weekend at home.

The following week, whilst she was following her psychiatrist consultant around, a mental patient stops her consultant and tells her that he had taken a walk when they served lunch and that he thinks that he may have missed his lunch. Her consultant tells the mental patient to tell the nurses and that they would ensure that he gets his lunch. He thanks her and then turns to this medical student and says, 'Do you remember me?'. Nothing rang in her head, and this medical student actually pretended that she knew the guy. Initially, she was thinking, 'These are mental patients. They might get violent if I disagree'. 'Yeah, of course I remember you!' she says in her most convincing tone to the guy.

Guess what the guy said? 'Remember when you asked directions from me to get to the train station during the weekend?'

By the time the alarm bells rang, it was too late. The consultant was already giving her a strange look and as it turns out, Mr MentalPatient is the RandomGuy she had asked directions from. Nobody told her before this that there were 3 types of mental patients running around in the mental ward: type 1 who is on 1-on-1 observation, type 2 who is allowed to roam in the ward but not out of it and type 3 like Mr MentalPatient who is allowed to go out of the hospital but must be back by curfew hours.

So, now can you tell me, how random is that?

[sej]

Kartini,

It's not random at all, as there is no such thing as random. You might be able to refer to these things as coincidences, but really, its all just cause and effect... the Butterfly Effect.

Something else to consider... the Birthday Paradox... Take 23 people, and there's a better than 50% liklihood two of those people share a birthday. 57 people is all it takes to reach 99% liklihood of two people sharing a birthday. (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Birthday_problem)

A similar problem is neighbours... how often do you run into your neighbours in your local shopping centre compared to when you run into them in a foreign city? (By foreign, I simply mean not your home town). It is surprisingly common.

[kartini]

@sej: I'm feeling that you don't use the word 'random' very often. Also feeling the generation gap here as well. @-@*rolls eyes*

@fardel: With keywords like 'fardel' and 'dreams', it was just too tempting not to post this. You gotta luv wikipedia! Although I must admit, the dream is an endless dream and no PrinceCharming involved.

To be or not to be– that is the question:
Whether 'tis nobler in the mind to suffer
The slings and arrows of outrageous fortune,
Or to take arms against a sea of troubles
And, by opposing, end them. To die, to sleep
No more – and by a sleep to say we end
The heartache and the thousand natural shocks
That flesh is heir to – ‘tis a consummation
Devoutly to be wished. To die, to sleep
To sleep, perchance to dream. Ay, there's the rub,
For in that sleep of death what dreams may come,
When we have shuffled off this mortal coil,
Must give us pause. There's the respect
That makes calamity of so long life.
For who would bear the whips and scorns of time,
Th’ oppressor's wrong, the proud man's contumely,
The pangs of disprized love, the law's delay,
The insolence of office, and the spurns
That patient merit of th’ unworthy takes,
When he himself might his quietus make
With a bare bodkin? Who would fardels bear,
To grunt and sweat under a weary life,
But that the dread of something after death,
The undiscovered country from whose bourn
No traveler returns, puzzles the will
And makes us rather bear those ills we have
Than fly to others that we know not of?
Thus conscience does make cowards of us all,
And thus the native hue of resolution
Is sicklied o'er with the pale cast of thought,
And enterprises of great pitch and moment
With this regard their currents turn awry,
And lose the name of action.—Soft you now!
The fair Ophelia! Nymph, in thy orisons
Be all my sins remembered. -Hamlet, Shakespeare-

[Chamin]

Lift Lurker,

When I smile with anybody, I am 100% sincere :o). The experiment is in analyzing the response, not in smiling :-p

In Sri Lanka, I almost always got a smile back. When I moved to Singapore, I found that people sometimes got scared just because I smiled. That is where I started recording the result.

You can generally get a person to smile back if you keep trying :o), probably unless it is an immigration inspector.

[Chamin]

By the way, I am back from my short trip to China and found that the immigration inspectors were fast, efficient and even smiling.

There is a set of buttons in front of the counters (not visible to the oficer), which the passenger can use to rank the service of the officer. I guess this is a good thing to add to US airports.

[kartini]

@angela: post-July, I hope that you enjoy every bit of your freedom as every man, woman, child, animal and lifeform should get. Just a little quote from 'Braveheart' to keep you going:

Aye, fight and you may die. Run, and you'll live... at least a while. And dying in your beds, many years from now, would you be willin' to trade ALL the days, from this day to that, for one chance, just one chance, to come back here and tell our enemies that they may take our lives, but they'll never take... OUR FREEDOM!
*Everybody, CHEER!*

[fardel]

I am speechless.
Am I one of:
Shakespeare's creation?
Angela's dream,
Lift lurker's nightmare?

[Karuna aka Kaye Moreno]

@Sej, think we have 23 regulars on this blog. how about we test your birthday paradox ? If everyone is game, I will start,
Person #1. My birthday is 15-Nov
Person #2. Please add your's next

[mike]

my birthday is 12 Jul
Person #3 Please add your's next

[Vernette]

Don't care if I'm amongst the 23...

My birthday is 8, April (I don't know anyone who has the same birthday as me by the way)

Person #4 Please add yours next

[person 4]

My birthday is aug 22
Person # Please add yours next

[person 5]

My birthday is feb 29 and i am 25 :)
Person #6 Please add yours next

[Person 6]

May 13.

[Person 7]

I do not know my real birthday because I was left on the railroad tracks (it was dark night and my mother think it was orphanage doorstep).

My best guess to my real birthday: August 3.

(More on sej's random trick. I think it does not have to be only birthdate. Any 23 people can pick each a random number from 1 to 365, and there is 50+% chance two of them will pick the same number)

[LIft Lurker]

Chaos theory is so fantastic and exciting.

Imagine realizing that butterfly in China flapping its wing can cause hurricane in Florida, and rooster crowing can cause the Sun to rise.

We also discover that people singing in the shower can sometimes cause our Lift to jam as they pass that floor.

[Ram]

Comment No.100!!!